All I Ever Wanted

Last week a friend asked what I’m working on with my writing. Well, that answer’s not so interesting because that story isn’t gelling. What’s more interesting is the story I’ve already written. It’s for an anthology and explore the idea that we can choose how we react to situations. That’s what I meant the story to be about anyway. I’m not sure if that idea came through!

The story features a woman with dementia and what she remembers is WWII, when she was able to get work as a welder, and after, when working opportunities shut down for women. Her story was strongly influenced by a documentary, The Life and Times of Rosie the Riveter. I saw this way back in 1992 - shortly before A League of Their Own came out - and I can still see one of the woman plaintively saying, “All I wanted was to weld one little gate.”

This woman, my character, has felt cheated ever since she’s been turned out of her job and now, stuck in dementia, can’t get away her negative feelings. Some of what we see is how she limited her daughter, passing along the “women can’t do” message with “girls can’t study chemistry.” Her daughter, however, even though her choices were limited by what she heard from her mother, is happy with her life.

Both of these characters are me. The mother reflects how I felt at my last job. I was in a bad headspace and had no idea how to get past it. I’ve had therapy since then and I meditate regularly so I’m in a better headspace but, even so, I think the daughter represents whom I want to be. She knows her path. She’s learning new things. She’s happy. I don’t yet know what my path will be, but I hope I’ll be as contented as this daughter is with hers.
Varo, Still Life Reviving

gendered baby clothes protect the world!

I learned today that in Islam one of the minor signs of the apocalypse is being unable to tell the difference between men and women, being unable to differentiate the genders. We got into this off of a discussion of why parents put gendered baby clothes on infants.

I so want a Buffy fanfic with this.

but ...

“I don't want to be mean, but …”

Stop right there. You’re about to be mean. If you want to say whatever’s coming after the word “but” then lose “I don’t want to be mean.” You’re being mean. Own it.

If you really don’t want to be mean, then “I don’t want to be mean so I’ll stop now.”

on the plus side

I called Dad last night for Father's Day, and he was working out how I could fit into his home if I need to. I don't believe that will become necessary, but I felt - and still feel - encouraged that he's ready to support me to that extent.

Ironic that my sister posted ...

My sister posted this.

A few weeks back we were e-mailing back and forth after I’d asked her if any of her husband’s relatives were into real estate. After I told her I’ll be selling the house because I can’t afford to keep it up, she did not reply. She did not reply at all. I heard nothing back from her.

"family" isn"t defined only by last names or by blood; it"s defined by commitment and by love. It means showing up when they need it most. It means having each other"s backs. - Dave Willis